Don’t Touch Me, I’m Electrified!

May 31, 2011 at 11:55 am Leave a comment

I’ve been practicing the Running Man lately, that dance move from the 80s. It’s a great cardio workout, plus, I can show off my “total rad” moves at the club. But I realize the more I dance on my shaggy carpet, the more my body accumulates a lot of static electricity. So when I hug a friend, they’re jolted with a lightning bolt of pain. (Sorry, Sachiko!) I really need one of these:

Static Electricity Eliminator

It’s a neat tool that releases any excessive electricity in your body. What you do is press the end of it to whatever you’re about to touch. The LCD screen flashes a happy face when it’s done discharging.

Static electricity (“seidenki”) especially runs wild in the wintertime when the air gets dry. I always also seem to get it in Vegas because so much of that town is carpeted. It gets to the point where everything I touch hurts me. It’s like an evil curse! I’d rather have everything turn to gold than electricity. ( ; _ ; )

Luckily, this tool was invented. Maybe it can discharge the extra fat around my hips, too!


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May 2011